Zankyou no Terror – 11

It’s settled: this sSILLY.FUCK-YOUeries is a complete piece of shit. Not even Yoko Kanno’s music could save it.

Nothing paid off. There were no answers. No resolutions. Zilch. Jackshit nada. Nine and Twelve just fucking die, and that was the best part of the episode: these two crazed, psychopathic, murderous fucks finally bit the bullet (in Twelve’s case, literally) and got what they fucking deserved. Meanwhile, they detonate a nuclear bomb in the stratosphere under impossible conditions (did you know a simple hot-air balloon can outclimb a fucking F-16 or its weapons components?), scattering radiation all throughout the earth’s atmosphere, destroying dozens if not hundreds of satellites, blinding tens of thousands if not millions of people, horrifically damaging Japan’s geopolitical position and social stability, and destroying the country’s entire electronic infrastructure, thereby sending the whole country plunging into a massive economic depression and wreaking untold suffering and havoc on over one hundred and twenty million innocent people for years. WHAT FABULOUS HEROES. WHAT PARAGONS OF VIRTUE. HUMANITY APPLAUDS YOU.

Oh, but “Von” means “hope” in Icelandic. That all makes up for it, right? That was the payoff we were all waiting for, right? I forgot that Shibazaki somehow represented Oedipus. To which I answer: HOW? HOW THE FUCK DOES SHIBAZAKI REPRESENT OEDIPUS? HIS CHARACTER AND ROLE HAD NO RESEMBLANCE TO HIM WHATSOEVER. DID YOU EVEN READ THE GODDAMN PLAY, YOU FUCKWITS? OEDIPUS IS A COSMIC TRAGEDY. THIS IS A FUCKING COMEDY OF STUPID.

This inane statement by Nine totally fits with Sphinx’s whole MO of incompetent terrorism that ultimately had no rhyme or reason behind it. It was just a childish tantrum of revenge against Japanese society for crimes a handful of politicians inflicted on them in secret. I was happy when Twelve got shot. I really was, even though there was no reason for the Americans to shoot him over the guy holding the detonator. Why not just shoot Nine instead? Oh, wait. They had to kill off Twelve first so that everything would be tied up in a neat little bow and seem poignant to idiots watching this show. This is not how you make an anime. This is never how you should make an anime. No one must ever make an anime this insultingly pretentious and grossly ill-constructed ever again.

Yoko Kanno can do wrong. I’m sorry, but it’s true. No one’s perfect, and some people are going to hell, specifically all the people whose names flashed onscreen during the last three minutes. Excuse me, I have to go call Light Yagami and tell him to get on that shit.

4 thoughts on “Zankyou no Terror – 11

    • One, it’s a bit insulting to call anime a “cartoon,” as if this is some sort of Saturday morning cookie meant for children. Anime is a medium, and it can be used to tell stories meant for children or thoughtful masterpieces, like any other medium. Two, yes, it is entertainment and I have every right to criticize it, even in a bombastic, over-the-top style as this. This is what people do when they review any sort of entertainment, and I have pretty harsh words for any anime that tries to rise above the typical otaku-tropes and address more serious topics with serious themes, as there are far better examples out there. When you try and fail so hard as this series did, I’m not going to let it slide.

      I’m not losing sleep at night over this. I’m just saying it did suck, something most anime fans will never do because they’re wrapped up in cheap, first-grade emotional thrills and their impressive bias towards all things anime. This was a bad series. The irking thing is that it was so bad in such a basic and fundamental way: its plot was inane at best, its characters were flat and completely undeveloped, and the relationship between those characters started atrophying the moment they appeared on screen. What’s more, the themes it meant to address were paper-thin and shallow to the point of hilarity. It felt like the series was checking off items in a list meant to attract more pensive viewers. Sprinkle in some odd literary references, hint at a larger tapestry of plots, throw in some government conspiracy fodder (involving the evil Americans), add some banal references to chess playing, and spice it up with some choice commentary on Japanese society that’s been done a million times before. Boom! Everyone loves how “deep” it is. Then you realize the show did actually blaze a trail or two, e.g., on the idea that Japan started making nuclear weapons in secret, and that makes its failure all the more grating. It could have been so much better.

      Pardon me for being an anime watcher with some standards.

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  1. Hah. love your humour. I fully agree with you here. Zankyou no terror is shit. I feel frustrated when I see people commenting about how “beautiful” it is or “best anime of the season” crap. I honestly worry about the intelligence of these people. High five! great post anyway.

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